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The only one thing that matters in a Blissful Life

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Lets start with a few numbers first
to understand the significance of our existence on this planet. If
life has been in existence for about 4 billion
years, every 80 years there is a complete refresh of entire ‘human’ population
and during these 80 years we are one among 7 billion, so by a simple
calculation the significance of our existence in relation to life and humanity
is about 1.142*10^(-17). Now all the
serious mathematicians reading this – pls understand the sentiment and don’t
start finding holes in the calculation.
If we don’t express this number in
this scientific manner the simple representation is ZERO. Lets call it the
state of ‘zeroness’
While each one of us gets his/her
dose of philosophy wrt the conduct of life encompassing advice ranging from
great health, selflessness, philanthropy, family time, wellbeing, wellness,
simplicity, lessons on leadership, I have for the 40 years of my life and 25
years of fully conscious life strived to search for one thing that matters the
most in life. That one catalyst that’s profoundly empowering.
That – in my
hypothesis is ‘fearlessness’.
I am no Guru or saint or any
philosopher. I am just a simple executive who works hard and tries to make two
ends meet and make a difference to my small insignificant ecosystem on a daily basis
but have come to conclude that fearlessness is THE most empowering  trait of life. A lot of gurus tell us about
meditation, breathing, yoga, karma – but have you ever reflected that, that too
is to fight the fear of something such as bad health, fear of failure, fear of
something or the other. Every advice, every direction is to counter a fear.
Become fearful and then take the medicine to counter it.
Why don’t we only work towards
becoming fearless and this one thing, one trait, one goal is simply the
solution to everything if one keeps the above mentioned math of
inconsequentiality/zeroness in mind.
I believe life has 3 facets – Work, Family and External Ecosystem.
Come to think of it our life revolves around just these facets. The biggest
question is how do we empower ourselves to rise in fearlessness rather than die
everyday in some form of fear. 
Lets address each one separately:
Work
In the backdrop of what’s happening
in the IT industry and the expected downsizing, I write about work first, as
this takes the largest timeshare of our life. At approx. 11 hrs a day this is
45% of our time.

As I walk into office each day I am excited and am keen to
achieve more than what the system expects. Ability to deliver more than what
people expect and become an outlier in each small way/deliverable is amazing.
But what if you aren’t able achieve the best or aren’t able to demonstrate
expected performance inspite of doing your best. The worst that can happen is
loss of job. And really that’s all. When we give more importance to the
employment rather than the result that we are paid to achieve we become
fearful.

No job will last forever, No Annual
Operating plan/budget will be achieved perpetually and not every month or
quarter will be that of the expected growth. It didn’t happen with Microsoft,
Google, Apple and Amazon and it wont happen in your company. So just chill and
simply do your best.
No boss will be perpetually happy
with you. But if you do the best that you humanly can in your job then God will
orchestrate your success. And this belief is empowering. But if you lie, shun
ownership and steal or indulge in corruption you will always live in a state of
fear. In this above-mentioned state of zeroness what is it that you are trying
to achieve or prove. You cant achieve anything or prove anything that will last
forever. But if you do the best that you can you feel empowered and empowered
human beings achieve extraordinary results.
Corruption debilitates and good
character empowers. Corruption isn’t only hardcore financial corruption.
Corruption is wrong/diluted intent. Intent has a smell, intent has a feel and
its clearly visible. And if your intent is honourable then stop being fearless.
Human beings with great intent are
guided by that invisible hand. Momentary failures are stepping stones to
success. If your intent is good then don’t fear failure because failure is
sometimes orchestrated for you by God to push you to a higher better state.
Your acknowledgement of your state of
zeroness should empower you to carry that proverbial resignation letter in your
pocket but don’t die everyday in the fear of being fired. That’s the worst that
can happen and in the cycle of life its 
meaningless. No one can fire you except your own self. And when this
fear of being fired is out of the window you feel empowered and as said above –
empowered human being achieve extraordinary results.
Family
For a major part of our life we
ignore and take our families for granted only to make them secure for a rainy
day and slog our life out because of some fear of an unknown chilly winter.
And we live in fear.
When we live life by the principle of
different strokes for different folks life gets complicated. If we try and lead
a life and treat our families as we would like to be treated life becomes
less-complicated.
Agree or not we are constantly trying
to prove a point. A point by buying/striving for a bigger better house / car /
exotic holidays / clothes / gadgets. Nothing lasts a lifetime. Everything
depreciates and eventually vanishes. But if – we lead a simple life where
material things stop bothering us and we just strive for all necessary comforts
without a pressure to demonstrate or win a race – you become fearless.
You become fearless when you lead a
minimalistic life and there is little to lose. When there is nothing to lose
you respect the relationships more than the material things of life. You find
better joy in eating at home with family and laughing with them rather than
suffering in the pressure of eating in a Michelin star restaurant, that you
reach after negotiating in traffic and investing time on travel and then
worrying about spending too much. How often have you celebrated a simple meal
with the entire family and a good wine and just enjoyed each others company
without proving anything to anyone and felt empowered because your need isn’t
the need to spend and feel pressured but your need is the need to feel
empowered in the joy of togetherness.
Wife, parents and children is all
there is to a family. If you treat your parents as you would like to be treated
when old, if you treat your wife as you would like your sister to be treated
life cannot be simpler. Uncomplicated lives empower you. Complicated lives make
you fearful.
When you gracefully accept life and
the cards that it deals for you, You feel empowered. You are fearful when you
cheat and when you lie and strive to acquire things that aren’t destined for
you. We make much lesser effort to work on our immediate relationships but
invest a far greater time catching up with inconsequential acquaintances – why
– to further our social circle. And no one in the social circle matters except
the immediate family.
Its surprising that divorce rates and
instances of spouses cheating on each
other
are at a historic (evolution to date) high. And this is because we are
striving for something that doesn’t belong to us or is meant for us. And that
creeps in fear. Fearlessness is when you can look in each others eyes and smile
with the greatest degree of confidence without even the need of saying – I Love
You.
Live within your means, eat like a
pauper and live like a king, don’t buy/spend to prove something but only spend
on what you need and You and Your family will feel empowered and fearless forever.
  
External
Ecosystem
This comprises of your friends and
relatives. I have realised that there are only going to be 4-6 truly reliable
people in this realm. And your true friends aren’t ever going to judge you by
your possessions or by your lifestyle. Whether you live in a 500 sq ft house or
50000 sq ft house their behaviour and blessings for you will remain the same.
The trick in life is to quickly identify these handful of people and ignore
(get rid of) the rest.
People who judge you by your car / home
/ holidays / liquor that you serve are just pests (assimilatory) in
your ecosystem.
Keeping up with the Joneses is the most fear inducing
and debilitating exercise. You feel empowered when you live within your means
and give away to someone in need. Giving away brings joy and brings a sense of
satisfaction. There is no need to
talk about poverty eradication and
global inequality in Davos
. Just try and behave well with your maid, driver,
security guards and try and make some difference to their life. It will empower
you.
If you fund the deficit of these
people who bring in the daily comfort to your life, its far more joyful than
the momentary satisfaction that you get by spending a similar amount of money
on an expensive meal that could be equal to your driver’s monthly salary. And
when you make an effort to tune your thoughts in this direction you become
fearless for there is nothing to lose but only to gain.
Live a comfortable life but spend on
what you need and not what you want and you will live fearlessly for the rest
of your life.
And lastly human beings are but a
figment of their thoughts and character. As
Thatcher said, Good thoughts lead to
good words, Good words become good deeds, Good deeds become good habits and
good habits become great character and character is everything.

Isnt it??

Manu also writes for Huffington Post

20 COMMENTS

  1. The timing if this piece is just amazing..fear abounds in all the 3 realms that Manu has stated…fearlessness is hardly written much lesser God.. who, the writer has subtly put on centre stage. Hats off to the eye opener.An area that is hardly spoken about but felt strongly , less said of the opposite.. fearlessness.

  2. Amazingly true Manu.. Can't agree more with the concept of fear in this artificially created modernistic and materialistic world.. Cheers and let the pen roar!!

  3. The most crippling of all human emotions-fear. If every mama bird and baby bird were to have fear in their heart, they would never fly. And the world would not have birds. To fly and to soar isnour birthright. To fly and to soar we need to shed fear. You have presented it in such a succinct, simple and palatable manner Manu-Congratulations my friend!

  4. Very well written Manu! Things are actually quite simple but we somehow all make them too complicated too many times. Keep on writing and reminding us! Very inspiring to read your words! Big hug from your friend in Germany

  5. What a fantastic read. Fearlessnes is the key to real living. Also loved your recommendation of finding your 'true friends',thats what it matters at the end of the day. Looking forward to more reads.

  6. Agreed…being a habitual contrarian I looked for thoughts to disagree with; all I could find is about 'eating like a pauper'. But, as they say, to each his own preferences 🙂

    Keep writing….

  7. Manu, that was a good read. I read it to the family at the dining table. I've seen you at home and I know that you practise what you preach.

  8. Sir, this state of self actualization can only be achieved when the more basic needs of life are met. Recent work has made me realize that there is still a vast majority of people who work to fulfill these basic needs and will continue to fear at work whether they will be able to feed their children tonight.

  9. MRG. As always well articulated a tad lengthy though. Fearlessness to me isn't liberation from our day jobs but it is the liberty to pursue our dreams. As dr. Kalam said dreams are not what we see during sleep they are what doesn't let us sleep. Fearlessness is not about roi it is about flipping it on its head and saying IOR (I own the reins). However I agree our eco system puts a lot of pressure to ensure that we don't get FL. Upto each individual to not buckle up and keep pursuing his / her dreams. Mindfulness as advocated by Harvard dr. Ellen langer beautifully links this concept with presence in each moment. So ya let's keep at it with courage since the fearful dies a billion times and the courageous dies but once. Start writing for newsable. Best of luck from an aspiring change runner. Amit.

  10. One of the finest pieces you have written Manu! Many of us wholly or partly sense it, understand it but you have managed to summarise it in words.
    Now we know the theory, question is how to practically achieve it. I think lets start living a day at a time maybe the first step to it..
    Keep writing and keep sharing these inspirational thoughts.

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Manu Rishi Guptha

CEO and Founder - MRG Capital - SEBI Registered PMS

MBA (Warwick Business School, UK) with 25 years of senior management experience in the hospitality industry and Fund Management. Held top management position in a number of pioneering hotel projects. Successful track record in asset, financial and operational management, market development, stakeholder relationship - development and management, customer and human capital retention.

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